Shea Dawson

Women have no place in the NBA, so they used to believe. Well little did they know, God had a different opinion about the matter and the authority to eventually make that statement untrue. As I sat at the first ever Women in Basketball Operations Forum hosted by the NBA, at All-Star weekend in Charlotte, NC. I listened to Mitch Kupchak, the former (Lakers GM) and current (President of Basketball Operations and General Manager of the Charlotte Hornets) speak about his era and his reign as the Lakers GM, and how foreign it was back then to hire a woman. He also admitted that he’d never thought about women in the NBA quite as he did that day. You could see the wheels turning in his head, and I remember thinking to myself “I'm sure this is a sight for him to see” as I looked around the room full of women, from high-level NBA execs to scouts, coaches, and ESPN and TNT analysts. I proudly smiled to myself and thought “Thank goodness times have changed.” It was so beautiful though to witness such a man, as highly revered as Mitch Kupchak to seemingly experience a revelation. I was already so thankful to be there in the presence of greatness, but seeing a man truly ponder change as it pertains to an old regime gave me goosebumps. I will never forget that moment as I am extremely proud to be working in the NBA today for the Philadelphia 76ers in their front office. I am the Manager of Player Programs and Team Services. My focus is on the player experience and the human to human elements of the job. I live in service and I love making other people’s lives easier. It’s the greatest job in the world in my opinion and no day is exactly the same. I get to provide value to others, watch sleepers develop and stars emerge. I get to learn about the business of basketball and its inner workings on how to build a winning team. I get to acquire information to help other hopefuls chase their dreams of one day breaking into the sports world. I get to witness history being made, not only within the league around me but right here in my own organization. This past month I got to witness the 76ers elevate my gorgeous and talented friend, Lindsey Harding, a Duke standout and number 1 overall draft pick in the WNBA, from the first Sixers female scout to busting down a major barrier in a male-dominated industry like ours, to becoming the first black female coach ever in franchise history. Talk about having impossible dreams, wow that was an emotional night for us. My cheeks were sore from smiling so much after the news broke.

When I look back on my own sports journey, beginning around the age 6 years old I could have never imagined working at the highest level of the very game that I have grown to love. Although, I am a woman working in the NBA, but being a professional athlete was never a goal of mine. Just saying that feels damn good to admit, to myself and to everyone else reading this. No, the WNBA was not on my heart, as I use to lie and tell people that would ask me as a little girl or in college. I mean, I didn't blame them because it was a logical question. If someone’s good at something, the natural progression is to do it at the highest-level right? But no one ever asks why? Why I was doing it, why I was playing? They just accepted what was. Well, I was terrified when the truth would creep into my mind. I felt like it was treason, like I was a fake or a phony because the answer wasn’t that I loved the game. I wondered if anyone else felt this way, I certainly couldn’t have asked. Only if someone had just asked me once, why was I playing? Then I might have been able to speak the truth much sooner than later, but life is amazing in this way. That’s not what was meant to happen. Maybe if someone did ask me, then I wouldn’t be writing this right now. I wouldn’t have made it this far in my career or love the game of basketball as much as I do today. If they had asked me, they would have discovered that I was playing for my family, for my mom and my baby brother. My mom worked so hard to provide for us. She worked for a company that demanded so much of her time but received so little return on her investment. She must have been a superhero, I’m sure of it because we never felt it. She protected us from shame, from bullying and teasing. Do you know how hard that is for a parent to do? To have no additional income outside of paying bills, if that, and still made sure that her two kids felt loved, had the best clothes and stayed involved in everything at school including extracurricular activities. The older I got, knowing this, how could I tell my mom that I didn’t want to play basketball, especially on an all-boys team, when that was the only option for me to play at that time. I knew she needed it, she needed a place for us to go. You see, as a kid, I was always connected with other people’s feelings and emotions. Today, I believe they call that an Empathy. My mom is one of those people I’m extremely connected to. Remember she’s a superhero, and she passed me down my own set of special powers. She was so strong and stern, yet so loving and so gentle. I was always observing people’s behavior and reading them like a psychic. My mom said that I would hug random strangers if they looked mean or touch pregnant bellies of women that I didn't know. I remember always trying to execute plans to help friends and family in trouble. I volunteered rides to people walking on the street, my mom would get so upset ha-ha. So, to bring this story full circle, I used to come up with multiple get rich quick schemes to help my mom with money. I asked her sophomore year to take me to the store, so that I could buy candy to sell at school. I saved my lunch money and ate the free lunch that was offered at school every day for a month, so that I could purchase the candy to sell. I told my mom that I had it all figured out and that I was going to sell one million pieces of candy for $1 and make her a million dollars. Pretty good plan, right? Wrong, it would have taken much more work than I’d put in and I was also dipping into my own supply (ha-ha). The point of me telling you all that was because, at age 6 I knew that my mom needed help with us, especially after school. Which meant spending more time at the YMCA and more time on the court. She needed that extra time to work longer hours and to get that second job around the holidays.

I continued playing ball because that’s what she needed me to do. I never once told her that I didn’t want to play, it’s wasn’t about me. Unfortunately, that’s was the fate of so many black children who grew up in my neighborhood being raised by their grandparents or in my case a single mother. We had to play a sport to save our lives and to dream of having a successful future. We hoped to become elite-level athletes, so that we could accept an athletic scholarship if offered. So that when we grew up our mothers didn’t have to stress about not being able to pay for a college. Only then could we even dream of having the opportunity to pay her back for all that she’s sacrificed. That was the burden that some kids being raised in America’s inner cities had to carry with them, and some even still to this day. That’s the real reason why I began playing sports. Some people begin playing for fun and others are playing for their lives. I thank God every day for the Jackie Robinson YMCA. I was raised there and so I’m thankful to have not fallen victim to the streets of southeast San Diego, CA. The YMCA provided me with a huge extended family in the San Diego Cougars. An AAU program started by a man named Jeff Harper. We all called him uncle Jeff and he along with a few other good men, they raised half of the southeast San Diego youth community. I wouldn’t change the way I came up for the world, because it made me who I am today. It taught me to be self-sufficient and independent. I grew up fast because I had to take care of my baby brother Malcolm, and my mom depended on me. Being responsible for another human life, taught me about the power of human connection. How he looked to me and asked me for advice, he trusted me. My relationship with Malcolm taught me about selflessness and empathy. I got a front row seat to watch what it’s like to experience nurture vs. nature, the outside influences and the pressures of being a young black man in America. Thankfully, Malcolm had our God father Mahlon Williams after I went off to college, to help him on his basketball/life journey. But through the San Diego Cougars, we learned about work ethic and the rigors of being an athlete, being committed to something. We learned about resilience and to compete. We learned about how things aren’t fair, how you have to earn everything in this world. We learned that anything given to us is not worth wanting, because someone can eventually take it away. It gave us the incentive to dream about something bigger than ourselves. I ended up developing into a two-sport athlete. I played both basketball and volleyball in high school and in college. I was stoked when I accepted that athletic scholarship I had dreamed of, but it didn't come easy. Why? Because I didn't pass my SAT test like the other top recruits in my class. I had waited too late, and I had rushed taking it once my senior year. I was devastated, humiliated, embarrassed and I felt like an idiot. I cried, and I sulked for days. I wore a smile on my face, but I was dying inside every time someone asked me where I was going to play in college, I shrank. Granted, I knew nothing about the process of accepting a scholarship. I thought you just said yes, and then signed on the dotted line. My mom didn’t finish college and didn’t know anything about recruiting at the time, my counselors at school never said a word to me about the clearinghouse, and my high school coach was new to the coaching world. There was one person though, who tried helping me through that rough patch. He had helped me to cram for my SAT during this stressful time, free of charge. Believe it or not, that person was my club volleyball coach Dan Thomassen. Ironically enough, I wasn’t even being recruited for volleyball out of high school, I was only being recruited for basketball. I don’t even remember if I ever thanked him properly but for the record, I want to say thank you Dan! Thank you, for all that you did for me.   

I eventually snapped out of my misery and disappointment in myself because I was still alive. I needed to continue, and it wasn’t the end of the world. I still had the same goals and I still needed to make my mom proud of me. I needed to pay her back. I began looking into Juco options with my cousins. They didn’t have colleges to attend in the fall either (but I’ll leave their stories for them to tell). After talking to a bunch of people and seeking advice from our close friends and family that were heavily involved in the basketball community. All three of us landed roster spots at Saddleback Community College in Orange County, CA. We moved up to Mission Viejo together shortly after HS. I never thought it would be one of the most critical decisions we’d ever make, to continue playing and to never give up. Our connection and the strength of our love got us through those difficult times. We won almost every tournament of our junior college careers. We fell short of a national championship, but we gained so much as people and improved as athletes. I was so grateful for that buffer between high school and a 4-year university because, in reality, I wasn’t really ready. At Saddleback I got to figure it out and it made my transition to play at the Division 1 level that much easier. I accepted a basketball scholarship to Robert Morris University, in Pittsburgh PA. I decided to move that far away because of all the lesson that I had learned on my journey to achieve my goals. I was ready for the world. Nothing was handed to me and it damn sure wasn’t easy. Both of my cousins and a few close teammates earned scholarships to play ball as well. They attended Ohio University, Cal State Dominquez Hills and Texas A&M Commerce. My cousin Ciara Iglehart and our close teammate Hazel Woods and I were inducted into the Saddleback hall of fame a few years following our college graduations. One of the single greatest moments in my life at that time, considering how my high school career ended. Following college, I took many paths to get to where I am today. You would think after each milestone life would get easier but that would be far from the truth. I worked as an intern for Five-Star basketball, Pangos All-American Camp, NBA Summer League, Adidas Nations and many others high level camps for many years. I made very little money, but I loved the grind. I loved being in the gym and being connected to so many people. I turned myself into a Grassroots Basketball Operations professional. I traveled all over the world working on the basketball operations side of these HS events. Sometimes, in order to gain the notoriety needed to land my next major gig, I had to pay my own way and just show up at places. I had to do this because it was so political, and females were not doing this type of thing at the time. I needed the experience and the stamp of approval from certain events to venture out. I also needed to meet the people in charge of this world that I was trying to penetrate and influence. I wore many hats during my apprentice years, but I found myself more fulfilled in a service role. This was not because I felt that it was a woman’s place, but because taking care of people is my gift. Not many people want to do it, not many people can, although it’s needed. My mom helped me to discover my gift early on. I always remembered the relationship that I had with my brother Malcolm growing up. How connected we were and still are. How my mom spoke to us and educated us about life. I wanted to pass that on to others, her guidance did so much for me. During these times, while everyone around me was trying to woo coaches and get college jobs to move up the ranks, I just wanted to make the environment less stressful for players and the coaches involved. I wanted to make sure that everyone had exactly what they needed. I moved in a way that allowed me entry into most rooms, rooms full of confidential information and important people. I did this by doing the jobs that no one else wanted to do, the thankless jobs needed to make the whole thing go but weren’t glamourous. In doing so, it forced me to strengthen my relationships with people because everyone was defense. I offered guidance to those who were blinded by their own personal goals of the NBA or being college assistants. I kept my ear to the ground and watched the moves people made and then did the opposite. I did anything from the airport runs, to laundry, printing things at Kinkos, restocking supplies, working the snack bar, etc. I waited my turn, and, in the meantime, I built my network of people up, of athletes, and heavy hitters. I did that all through service.

I have learned from so many great people in my life, and as I mentioned my mom is one of them. She is the strongest person I know. She moved us to California at an early age, from a small town called Columbia Missouri where she grew up. She relocated to one of the most expensive cities in America to live, with two young children under the age of 5. That woman is remarkable to me. I know it’s because of that reason alone, that I have always been an optimistic person. I was never afraid to leave everything behind and pick up to move if needed. I was even that way as an athlete. I was the kind of athlete that never took losses too seriously because I knew we’d be better for it in the long run. I faced and understood failure early on in my life and wow, did it make me better! I truly believe that everything happens for a reason. That reason is usually a far better reason than any of us humans could ever phantom. Which is why I have always been fascinated by the comradery surrounding team sports. It’s funny because I was always that girl that won the most inspirational awards on every team. I was never really rewarded with merit for my athletic abilities although I was always in the starting lineup of almost every team that I played for. I could never understand why I wasn’t one of those girls, you know? The girls who always lead the team in scoring and made the all-everything teams, achieved the status that actually mattered to the masses. I guess because I didn't audit myself well enough back then, although deep down inside I knew why. I wasn't the hardest worker, I wasn’t going to win each sprint although I was fast enough, I wasn't the girl in the gym first or the last to leave. I was the girl that was always motivating the best players. I was the girl that was able to inspire my team to work together or communicate hard truths. I was the type of teammate that put my arm over the best players shoulder, trying to convince her to never give up, never doubt herself. I was the one always thinking about everyone else during the turmoil. I was the teammate that was truly happy for another's achievements. I mean, I couldn’t for the life of me figure out why I was this way? Why I cared? I knew that it wasn’t the popular thing to be, and some of you all reading this are probably thinking, God she’s soft. Well, that’s okay because I am soft, someone has to be!

I started to pay closer attention to who I truly was, verse who I thought everyone wanted me to be. Some of us must follow first in order to become better leaders. I’ve always loved the question. If everyone is leading, then who’s following? Because we all have a place on this earth. Everyone has a purpose and a role in this world, but it’s not always spelled out for us. In order to find it, you have to be willing to listen to that inner voice and pay close attention to what you gravitate towards. In my case, I had to step back and observe what the universe had been trying to reveal to me all along. It had been trying to show me who I was, as a sister, as a daughter, as an athlete, and as a teammate. That people are my thing, and that human connection wakes me up in the morning every day. That my one skill, where I can put a team on my back and win is with the people. My ability to create a safe space for others to feel free of judgment physically and psychologically is what I’m the MVP of. God was training me to be what I was always meant to be, a woman of the people and a natural born, unconditional lover. Through my sports journey, I have learned this and so much more about myself. Basketball has given me everything that I have today and although some details are kind of a blur, I am still here! I am still standing, still fighting, still learning and still growing because of it. I am so very thankful for the impact that sports have had on my life and I will never take it for granted.

My word of advice for the young women out there, is that failure is inevitable. Embrace it and use it to your advantage, to teach you about yourself and the things you want and don’t want out of life. Be you, because your authentic power is what’s going to help you fight through adversity and lead you toward your true happiness. Stay connected with good people and do things out of the kindness of your heart because those are the moments you’ll gain the most joy from.   

- Shea Dawson